The Brilliant Life

by Shawn Creitz


No grand entrance is ever made by it. It just shows up on the day you were born.  It is always there, it just hovers around you in a fog or haze of nothing and everything.  On the wings of a clock, it approaches your existence and glides along the edges of your vision, dancing and parading just out of sight.  In and out of light and shadows it moves quietly with determination to remain as loudly out of your mind as it can.  From time to time, boredom will overcome its stealth antics and it will cross directly in front of your eyes, reminding you that it exists and is waiting.
Knowing what it is, you will look at the sand beneath you, look at the small hole your head will eventually fill, and you feel some sort of power over it.  You can hide and you can pretend that it is not there or that it is not powerful.  The hole will become a sanctuary from the fear and trepidation that it brings every time it reminds you that it is there to stay.  You will avoid it every time it chooses to show a mere glimmer of itself, and by doing that you give it more power over you.
You will sing, laugh, twirl in fabulous colors, and you will wallow with selfish joy in love and someone else.  Life will be filled with stories, memories, photos and emotions of the people, events, and choices you have made.  Breathless moment after breathless moment surrounded by mere minutes of terror, fear, and relief.  You will demand that your soul leave its print on this world and you will make sure as many people will feels its power every day.
Eventually it does not just let you know it is watching, it will stand proudly in front of you and make sure you understand that everything in your life is over and has always been for someone else.  For lots of someone elses.  For the man you have made love to, fought with, and stood side by side with.  For the sister with whom you have shared all your secrets, stole her clothes, and mocked her funny shoes.  For the people at work who know your heart and know your ethics each day you sit in the muddy waters with them.  You have smelled flowers, kissed lips, and cried rivers so that when it finally comes, the ones you love now will love you until it is their turn to stop dancing and breathing. 
When they stop their own tears, and they can raise their heads without the pain resonating deep in their chest, they will pull out those photos, and memories and stories and you will live again.  You will be funny, you will be drunk, you will fall down and you will stand back up.  You will still make them laugh and make them angry.  They will love you all over again.
When it comes to taunt you and show that it has not forgotten you, do not put your head under the sand, do not shy away from its impressive performance, look it in the eye, straighten your spine and smile. For you know with everything you have that you will live on forever in the form of what was and what will never be again. 
You will live on forever as the one person that only you could be.