The
fight from the previous day haunted her mind - she replayed what was
said and what should have been said, every word a dagger to her
heart. She regretted crying in front of him,
but she lost complete control over her emotions once her father spat
out his malignant and prejudiced views. Never before had she realized
that one person could be that ignorant, be so hateful.
His
seething anger licked at her thoughts like a wildfire and every shout
bruised her already fragile state. She could feel herself falling
through the cracks in her psyche, losing herself to the void. The
idea of the infinite black sea of gloom and desolation tired her as
she gazed up at the dull, white ceiling. Drowsiness burdened her eyes
and a yawn escaped her pale lips. Deciding to give in to the nagging
need to sleep, she glanced at her phone one last time. As expected,
there were no new messages. Which, of course, was to be expected.
Friends sent messages, and she had none. She plugged her phone into
the charger, ignoring the vibrations as she placed it under her
pillow. She wrapped her superhero blanket around her, snuggled into
her solidarity and closed her eyes, allowing the easiness of sleep to
engulf her.
As
she was lulled into the final stages of sleep, a sort of unease
trickled down her spine, prickling her senses. She shivered as her
eyes fluttered open and her breath caught in her throat. The
unnerving feeling of being watched clung to her as her lungs lightly
grasped for air. It wasn’t until her vision adjusted that she
noticed the strange figure at the foot of the bed. Involuntarily, she
yanked her blanket up over her nose, leaving it just low enough to
peer at what appeared to be a young, decrepit girl. The Girl wore no
clothing, and her flesh was ghastly and lurid, with vibrant wounds
scattered across her body like flowers in a vast meadow, and just as
colorful. Deep, red welts danced from her toes to her cheeks, smooth
lines similar to paint strokes on a canvas. Bruises bloomed on her
face, legs, and arms, swelling with the colors of darkest night sky.
Her lips were sewn shut, her skin translucent, and her dark hair
seemed endless. What perturbed her most about the Girl were the black
holes where her eyes should have been, and how she grinned with such
malice and contempt. She wanted to scream and to run, yet she was
paralyzed by her fear, and, to her surprise, curiosity. This Girl
could almost be a reflection of her – at least, of how she felt.
The
room darkened around the Girl and murk tainted the air. She watched
her saunter to the head of the bed, gazed up at the malevolent smirk
engraved on her cold, stony face. Slender, clammy fingers caressed
her throat, ceasing her breath and will. It felt as though a brick
had smashed her airway, but she did not mind. Closing her eyes for
the final time, she relaxed her struggling lungs and aching neck.
Take
me with you, I’m ready for this,
a feeble voice inside screamed. Like a drop of dye in water, the
darkness spread through her within seconds. Her existence seemed to
be bobbing ever gently down into the void.
Much
like the cliché, the conclusion to her story was filled with old
memories. Her father’s stern, detached face glared down at her, his
venomous words belittling her more with every passing day. Concern
and confusion washed over her mother’s face, and her sister stood
next to her with an aura of indifference.
Time
was no longer a solid line; all that was, is and would be occurred at
once. She saw her empty room and her blanket tossed on the floor, and
heard the water running through the ajar bathroom door. Her mother
was crying in their living room, adorned in all black attire. An
endless stream of family and friends offered food or floral
arrangements to her, only to be shooed out of sight by the father.
The strangers blended together like faceless sheep, giving their fake
condolences to her parents. A pang on fury vibrated through her as
she heard her father repeat, “I just don’t understand why,”
like a scratched record, over and over, “it happened out of
nowhere.” The sheep nodded in unison before vanishing back out of
importance. Her sister didn’t even bother with the pleasantries as
she lazed about on the couch. The extent of her efforts ended at her
knee-length black dress. Apathy oozed from her distant eyes, the
whole situation had gotten old.
The
film was reaching its end and the final scene was playing out. Warmth
rushed over her as the tub filled around her. Dipping her head under
the water, she rather enjoyed the comforting silence. She had worked
herself up for this very moment, and she didn’t need to hesitate
any longer. The cold blade sliced down like a hot knife through
butter. Roses blossomed within the water until the whole lake was
transformed into the majestic ruby droplets. Rain clouds gathered
above her rose garden and let loose the divine water of the heavens.
Not one ray of sunlight could pierce through, and her temperature
plummeted. The rain started to freeze, hail crashed and snow swayed
down toward her. She had never realized such beauty was possible, and
it amazed her.
She
could finally breathe.